These days, a worrisome growing number of children clearly states that they hate school. While it is natural for a child to complain about this, statistics indicate that approximately 10% of the students go to great lengths just to avoid going to school. In fact, some of them dislike the idea of attending classes so much that they become depressed and anxious when they are forced to go, while a small percentage even fake illnesses just to skip classes. Following is a top 10 list of the reasons why your child may detest school and what you can do about it.
1. They perceive it as doing jail time
The number one reason most children can’t bear going to school consist of the fact that they perceive it as very restrictive, both physically (they need to be seated during class) and mentally (they have to concentrate on the lessons and follow the teachers’ instructions). Changing the child’s point of view on this one is going to be tough, especially since the rebellious attitude is specific for kids who enjoy the freedom to do whatever they like at home. Nonetheless, you can do it by constantly reminding him that school is the place where he can make new friends and learn more about the world he lives in.
2. It’s all about the teachers
The way teachers perceive their job and the method they use to relate to their students is another possible explanation for why your child detests school. Some teachers’ attitude towards your child can be rude, abusive and threatening. However, it can also imply the teacher is putting too much pressure on the students or he manifests an openly favoritism towards certain ones. Even though helping your child develop more self-confidence is necessary in this case, it is also recommended that you have a talk with that teacher or the principal.
3. Your own attitude
Your own attitude about how the child should perceive learning is another factor that can explain why he hates school so much. Constant criticism about getting good grades, taking on harder tasks, being more involved in extracurricular activities and performing better in general is commonly perceived as unnecessary pressure. While there is nothing wrong with wanting to help your child build a better future for himself, put yourself in his shoes: how would you like it if your boss would come in every five minutes to ask if you finished your task because he has several other waiting to be completed on that very day?
4. Family issues
According to psychologists, the verbal and physical behaviors children see in their families can trigger repulsion towards school. When parents are frequently fighting in front of their child (or the child has to hear his parents quarrelling), he will instinctively feel the need to stay home in order to support his mother. In other words, because the child feels he is more needed at home, having to go to school becomes an unbearable task he will subconsciously detest.
5. Separation anxiety
If a child is used to getting a lot of tenderness and affection at home, then it is very likely he will come to hate school due to the anxiety generated by having to leave the safety and love of his quarters. The good news is that separation anxiety is typical for children of younger ages and it will resolve itself in time.
Back in the days, you could easily tell if a child hated going to school simply because he could not take the abuse of the school bullies. Nowadays, bullying has taken on a more serious form, namely the cyber bullying, an abuse which has claimed several lives until now. If this is why your child hates school, then it is imperious that you teach him how to defend himself; however, if this strategy does not give any results, it is highly advisable to work on a solution with the teachers.
Boredom of the routine they need to undergo daily represents one of the basic reasons gifted children come to dislike going to school. If you were caught up in such a tedious routine, wouldn’t you look for a change as well? More often than not, the best way to deal with this is to show your child just how much fun he is missing by skipping those classes.
8. Health problems
Not having the same energy as his colleagues, poor vision that impedes him from seeing the notes on the blackboard or learning disabilities enter the category of health issues that might be causing your child to do his best to skip classes. Therefore, if you have reasons to suspect your child might be suffering from a health problem which makes him unable to cope with the school environment demands, it is strongly recommended to see a pediatrician.
9. The trip to school
However strange it may sound, some students do not have a problem with the teachers and their peers, but rather with the means of transportation they employ to get to school. Irrespective of whether they have to deal with a rude bus driver or the overall agitation during the trip is bothersome, some children feel unsafe and anxious about it. The solution comprises of finding a new way for him to get to school.
10. Peer pressure
Whether in the first grades or high school, children tend to take the opinion of their friends and colleagues for granted. Peer pressure is among the top factors that determine a good student to change his attitude towards school, while leading him to make bad decisions and to adopting bad habits. It is important to note that peer pressure involves more than hanging out with the wrong crowd and hence, can mean not being welcome in the group, rude remarks or feeling a strong urge to have the things that other kids have. The only solution in this case comprises of communicating with your child and working to build his confidence.