Young kids don’t make sense out of the concept of truth the way we adults do but when they lie, it hurts parents a lot since it breaks the precious bond of trust. Children are very creative but also innocent; they need to be dealt sensitively so that you don’t end up instilling their mind with fear. So let us see the life from a child’s point of view to know why they need to lie.
10. “I didn’t do it; it was Roger the Rabbit… “
But who is Roger? It’s the child’s imaginary friend. This is normal with kids of preschool age who confuse fact and fiction. Psychiatrists consider it as more of a child’s creativity than a lie where kids make a fictitious scapegoat rather than accepting their mistake. Sometimes kids need their imagination to cope up with the reality. If it continues later in the childhood, better take help of a psychiatrist.
9. “I don’t know… “
This one is very common. Mom asked her kid about who ate all the brownies and the kid, still enjoying the taste of chocolate in his mouth, could not answer to accept his act, instead chooses to say, “I don’t know.”
8. “First thing tomorrow… “
This is an example of procrastination, why do it today when you have got tomorrow. Mom asks little kid to clean up his room but he postpones it saying, “Mom I’m so tired today, I’ll do it first thing tomorrow…” Three days later, kid gets scolded by his mom with a lecture on laziness.
7. “But I only just started… “
This usually happens when kid sits on computer or turns TV on for a limited time, the more is always less. He has been playing for like one and a half hour but as soon as mom notices it, he says that he had just started.
6. “Wow, you look beautiful mom” or “You look younger than most of my friend’s moms”
When parents get compliment on their hair not brushed up in days or on a food which suddenly tastes so delicious, they are not to be trusted. The moment they hear praise like that, they know something is not right; either the kid needs a favor or he is trying to sugarcoat something wrong. Parents need to check the kitchen for something broken or spilled or they need to check their garden for plants being stuck together by a duct tape after being smashed with a ball.
5. “Mom, can I get the new Playstation 4?”
“But everyone else has it mom… “
We have all been there when the kid desperately tries to persuade his mom to buy a new video game and at the same time using conformity to achieve it. Even though everybody may not have it, parents will be forced to conform to everyone else.
4. “Mom, but there was no homework today… “
The kid tells mommy that he has completed his homework or there was no homework at all, so he goes to play. After he comes back, he is tired and does not wish to study. The next morning he remembers he has got some homework to do. He thinks that had he done it before, he would not have to be the one standing and facing the wall in his English class.
3. “Ahh! My stomach hurts so bad.. mom, can I skip school today? “
This one is followed by ‘Incomplete Homework’ scenario; kid didn’t do the homework he was supposed to do the day before so he decides to fake a stomach ache demanding not to go to school today. Same is also applicable when there is a scheduled test in the class, bully in school, fight with classmate, or duh.. (actually ill!)
2. “I don’t know where those tenors went dad, I didn’t take them… “
This one scores second in criticality of reasons kids lie to their parents. Since the allowance of kid is not enough to afford a game of Playstation down the street or he may not be allowed to play that at all, but he could see his dad’s wallet lying in the study. He takes a couple of bucks expecting his father would not notice and goes to play without permission. This encourages stealing and constant lying that demands careful attention from parents to stop kids developing this habit.
1. When the kid thinks- “If I do not lie, I will get more punishment.. “
Lying in order to save a corporal punishment tops the list of reasons why kids lie to their parents. Kids to escape, and merely the idea of punishment would void my conscience of any guilt for lying. It feels like an easy road with a reward of being spared at the end. This kind of lie forms base of all lies and needs to be dealt with affection since it creates fear in the child and if he grows up with fear in his mind; he becomes a prisoner of his own constrained thoughts. Begin treating the kid by saying- “If you tell the truth, we will not hurt you at all… “.